Author: Maryjane Willms
Tex rolls into Blood Gulch like a hurricane in black armor, and suddenly everyone else looks like they’re playing pretend. She’s the only one who can actually fight, and she proves it by kicking ass and taking names—usually Church’s. The Reds and Blues are out here arguing over a rock, and Tex is dismantling tanks with her bare hands.
What’s funny is how she’s surrounded by idiots and still gets stuff done. Tucker’s hitting on her, Caboose is calling her “mean lady,” and Church is whining about their breakup, but Tex just keeps punching. She’s the straight man in a circus, and her deadpan “I hate you all” energy is perfect.
Favorite Tex moment? When she beat up the entire Red team single-handedly, then walked off like it was Tuesday. She’s too cool for Blood Gulch, and that’s why she fits right in.